Pause to Unpack Anger
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Opening: We wanted to have a conversation about anger, building from last week’s sermon.
Coaching a team or teaching a class and you get hung up on a new skill or lesson then the coach doesn’t just move along. The coach pauses and works through it. After teaching through Ephesians 4 last week then the discussion after the service was really really good. Many were so engaged last week with the text.
I think there were parts of it that you might have said I am not sure I fully understand that when it comes to anger and so this morning I want to unpack it a little further. Repentance ministry has been a major part of my life and I say it over and over that knowing the steps of repentance has kept me in ministry and at bridge of Faith going on 18 years. I love it and I think everyone in this church should go to OneHeart Wholistic Center and meet with a Biblical counselor and go through Heart of the Problem book. The book does a good job of laying out scriptures in a way that helps you walk through repentance.
So this morning I want to invite Cameron and Sarah on stage to talk further about anger and what the Bible has to say about anger.
Anger: emotional reaction of displeasure and/or antagonism; an impulse to retaliate, punish or seek revenge. Anger can vary in intensity from mild annoyance that is hardly noticeable to extreme overmastering rage resembling insanity. Anger can trigger an outward display ranging from a light change of expression to destruction or murder; from a mild word to enraged screaming.
~ Heart of the Problem, p. 178
Last week, I said Ephesians 4:26 was not a command to be angry but it can be a little confusing and particularly in other translations
26 Be angry and do not sin. Don’t let the sun go down on your anger,
26 “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry,
Ephesians 4:26 - means “deal quickly with it”
Sarah: display (or evidence) of anger is sudden (unlike gossip/stealing, etc.)
i.e. terms we use “blow your top” “fly off the handle” “explode”... seemingly immediate or impulsive
-we tend excuse it and blame on someone else's actions or circumstances out of our control (“I couldn't possibly be the problem”)
-a display of anger shows we are out of control
-something is out of our control/ we try to control/ it ends up controlling us
-fruit of the Spirit is self-control
•Example of road rage: it comes from within and shows what’s happening in our hearts
Impulsive nature of anger reveals it is in our heart.
20 Then He said, “What comes out of a person—that defiles him.
21 For from within, out of people’s hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immoralities, thefts, murders,
22 adulteries, greed, evil actions, deceit, promiscuity, stinginess, blasphemy, pride, and foolishness.
23 All these evil things come from within and defile a person.”
Jesus in the Temple
13 The Jewish Passover was near, so Jesus went up to Jerusalem.
14 In the temple complex He found people selling oxen, sheep, and doves, and He also found the money changers sitting there.
15 After making a whip out of cords, He drove everyone out of the temple complex with their sheep and oxen. He also poured out the money changers’ coins and overturned the tables.
16 He told those who were selling doves, “Get these things out of here! Stop turning My Father’s house into a marketplace!”
17 And His disciples remembered that it is written: Zeal for Your house will consume Me.
- most common example from Scripture when it comes to anger: “Jesus got angry and turned over tables!”
On the temple mount, there was a whole area designated for the Gentile, the outsider. They were not allowed to go into the courts of the temple. They could only get close and look to God from a distance. That’s how the levitical system was set up. But it was their space.
The religious leaders had turned this area into a marketplace:
The priests decided Roman money was not acceptable, so the people had to exchange it for Jewish money
The priests approved what sacrificial animal the outsider had to purchase
The priests determined the prices for these animals
The priests held all the animals
The priests ran the whole enterprise
And they put all of this right in the middle of the space reserved for the outsider to come and worship God.
Whip of chords: Every rabbi had tassels on his robe. Some have suggested that this “whip of chords” was actually Jesus “waving His tassels in the face of these money changers, shaming them for perpetuating this injustice and calling them to obedience.”
Might be a stretch ?
Takeaways:
Jesus is never said to be angry
He doesn’t whip people
He doesn’t scream
Jesus is concerned with the religious leaders preventing the outsiders from worshiping God - talk about a righteous heart or frame of mind!
In Matthew’s account, look what happens immediately: “the blind and the lame came to Him at the temple, and He healed them” (Matthew 21:14)
The sick and the suffering would not have approached Him if He was in a rage and looked violent and intimidating
Sarah:
•additionally Matthew records what Jesus did as wonderful : “But when the chief priests and teachers of the law saw the wonderful things he did and the children shouting in the temple courts," Hosanna to the son of David,” they were indignant.”
•Mark records it as that Jesus was teaching the crowd as he was flipping the tables and that the crowd was “amazed by his teaching”
•Luke’s account says the people “hung on his words”
*** So I really don’t think this event was like we tend to think….
Jonathan:
Verse 17 Zeal for my house
Zeal
In modern Eng. usage, fervour in advancing a cause or in rendering service. But the corresponding Heb. and Gk. words in the Bible can have a bad sense. Thus qānā’ (verb), qin’â (noun), are often rendered *‘ENVY’, ‘envious’ (as in Gn. 26:14; Ps. 37:1), or *‘JEALOUS’, ‘JEALOUSY’ (Gn. 37:11; Jb. 5:2), and once ‘passion’ (Pr. 14:30), as well as ‘zeal’ in a positive sense (2 Sa. 21:2).
Cameron: transition question:
From Cameron & Jodi’s sermon debrief last week…
Questions:
Is it always the sin of anger when I get upset about something?
At what point does frustration about something become anger?
Is there a difference between a natural response to hurt or pain that isn’t sinful?
Jonathan:
I am thankful that you and Jodi were debriefing the sermon and I thought this was fun. As we unpacked this, then I thought we were back to the topic of dating. Back in the day for those of us who grew up in church might remember the curriculum True Love Waits. Number one question that was asked was how far can you go dating and not sin. Is holding hands a Sin? Is kissing a Sin? Is putting your arm around your girl on the church van a sin?
So when it comes to anger then we like to ask ourselves how far can we go in anger and it not be sin.
Heart of the Problem: “Is being a little bit angry like being a little bit pregnant?”
So you want to know if your frustration or aggravation is anger then ask those around you. Ask your children do you think I am an angry person? Ask your coworkers?
Sarah: absolutely, great idea to ask those closest to you…but also ask the Holy Spirit. -Do spiritual inventory, list the fruit of the Spirit and do a heart check (Psalm 139:23-24)
23 Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my concerns.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me; lead me in the everlasting way.
-It comes down to either walking in the Spirit or walking in the flesh.
We are either walking in ALL of the Spirit or none of it. (Like oil and water they don't mix)
Why do we defend it?
I think in the western church we have been influenced that we as humans are not all that bad. We don’t really do wrong so we spend a lot of time trying to justify that which we know is wrong because we are not wrong people.
Cameron I do want to balance this with Holiness because our desire is to pursue holiness and our desire is not that we walk around sinning saying that we are bad but as we pursue holiness when anger comes up we deal with it and not justify it.
When something goes wrong in a marriage or friendship what is better admit you are wrong early on or wait on it and not confess you are wrong. Deal with it quickly. In the same manner what is so bad about taking your anger to Jesus quickly. It is why he died on the cross to pay the penalty for our sin!
Scriptures from Heart of the Problem ?
19 My dearly loved brothers, understand this: Everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger,
20 for man’s anger does not accomplish God’s righteousness.
21 “You have heard that it was said to our ancestors, Do not murder, and whoever murders will be subject to judgment.
22 But I tell you, everyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. And whoever says to his brother, ‘Fool!’ will be subject to the Sanhedrin. But whoever says, ‘You moron!’ will be subject to hellfire.
23 So if you are offering your gift on the altar, and there you remember that your brother has something against you,
24 leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled with your brother, and then come and offer your gift.
25 Reach a settlement quickly with your adversary while you’re on the way with him, or your adversary will hand you over to the judge, the judge to the officer, and you will be thrown into prison.
26 I assure you: You will never get out of there until you have paid the last penny!
8 Refrain from anger and give up your rage; do not be agitated—it can only bring harm.
24 Don’t make friends with an angry man, and don’t be a companion of a hot-tempered man,
25 or you will learn his ways and entangle yourself in a snare.
17 A quick-tempered man acts foolishly, and a man who schemes is hated.
32 Patience is better than power, and controlling one’s temper, than capturing a city.
Sarah:
We defend it in part because we don't recognize that we are as guilty as the one we are mad at.
Matthew 6:15 says that if we do not forgive others their sins then our Father will not forgive us our sins. God is telling us to love and forgive others to the same measure He loves and forgives us.
How do we get freedom?
What are the pathways to dealing with anger / how do we heal?
Jonathan: share from his conversation with Randy about how we just want to justify our anger. But if we are honest about it, Jesus is the cure.
9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
Jonathan: suffering is part of life, but in the West we want to deny this reality and then get angry anytime we experience or see suffering. Podcast on Dr. Marshall and Suffering
Sermon on suffering and those who understand the purpose or meaning behind the suffering then they suffered well. In concentration camps when they smoked their last cigarette then you could guarantee that person would be dead in 24 hours because their hope was gone.
Road rage and now that I have a 16 year old daughter driving then I have patience for others on the road because what if that is a permit driver.
Cameron: Jodi reads lots of books and specifically enjoys historical fiction. She recently read two stories about World War II. One holocaust survivor, Corrie Ten Boom, forgave a guard at the concentration camp where her sister died. She spoke about forgiveness:
“Those who were able to forgive their former enemies were able also to return to the outside world and rebuild their lives, no matter what the physical scars. Those who nursed their bitterness remained invalids. It was as simple and as horrible as that.
And still I stood there with the coldness clutching my heart. But forgiveness is not an emotion–I knew that too. Forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart.”
Should I share this quote or no?
I think this is good.
Another book she read told the story of a holocaust survivor who stated: “ I can never bring myself to forgive them for what they did.” But even he understood that walking in hatred and anger is a prison for the soul.
- Not sure about sharing this piece
Steps of Repentance w/ Scripture references on the screen
Step 1: Confess, I am wrong. I have sinned.
19 “This, then, is the judgment: The light has come into the world, and people loved darkness rather than the light because their deeds were evil.
20 For everyone who practices wicked things hates the light and avoids it, so that his deeds may not be exposed.
21 But anyone who lives by the truth comes to the light, so that his works may be shown to be accomplished by God.”
Step 2: I say to God, I am sorry. I have sinned
9 Now I rejoice, not because you were grieved, but because your grief led to repentance. For you were grieved as God willed, so that you didn’t experience any loss from us.
10 For godly grief produces a repentance not to be regretted and leading to salvation, but worldly grief produces death.
11 For consider how much diligence this very thing—this grieving as God wills—has produced in you: what a desire to clear yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what deep longing, what zeal, what justice! In every way you showed yourselves to be pure in this matter.
Step 3: I ask, God, forgive me of my sins
9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
Step 4: I ask, God cleanse me of my sins
7 But if we walk in the light as He Himself is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin.
Step 5: I ask, God Empower me
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faith,
23 gentleness, self-control. Against such things there is no law.
Sarah:
Isaiah 59:1-2 - it is our iniquities that separate us from our God
1 Indeed, the Lord’s hand is not too short to save, and His ear is not too deaf to hear.
2 But your iniquities have built barriers between you and your God, and your sins have made Him hide His face from you so that He does not listen.
-Repentance leads to intimacy with God and intimacy with God is the only way we can experience authentic relationships with others.
We serve and love others purely from a right relationship with God.
End with a call to find freedom in Christ
Jonathan: Wrap up
Remind everyone about Harriger/Peck retirement celebration lunch
Remind everyone to get their 2024 Giving Statements from Lauren in the Lobby
