The Woman Who Fears the Lord

Bill Connors

Special Sundays: Mother's Day • Sermon • Submitted 6 years ago

Proverbs 31:10–31

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B:Proverbs 31:10-31

Housekeeping Stuff & Announcements:

Welcome, introduce yourself. Invite guests to the Parlor following service.

Happy Mother’s Day, and on Mother’s Day every year, we take up a special one-day offering in support of the New Mexico Baptist Children’s Home in Portales, NM. This is a great ministry that has a positive impact for Christ in the lives of so many children. Our goal for this one-day offering is $3,600. Pray and give what God would lead you to give when we take up the offering at the close of service today.

No evening service or other activities tonight.

Next Sunday, we are going to begin a church-wide focus on intentionally sharing our faith. This focus is called “Who’s Your One?” I have a short video to share with you about “Who’s Your One?”

This afternoon from 3-5, there will be a come-and-go reception in Miller Hall for 7 of our graduates hosted by their parents. Directions to Miller Hall.

JD GREEAR VIDEO

Next Sunday is Mother’s Day, and on Mother’s Day every year, we take up a special one-day offering in support of the New Mexico Baptist Children’s Home in Portales, NM. This is a great ministry that has a positive impact for Christ in the lives of so many children. Our goal for this one-day offering is $3,600. Pray and be prepared to give what God would lead you to give next Sunday morning.

Be in prayer for who your “one” is, and how you might start to be intentional in looking for opportunities and openings to share the truth of the Gospel of Jesus Christ with them in the weeks to come. I’ll be preaching a short “Who’s Your One” series of messages beginning next Sunday.

And now, I present to you the Eastern Hills Baptist Church Student Ministry Graduates for 2019.

Also next Sunday evening is our bi-monthly business meeting. Please plan to be here at 5:30 in the Sanctuary next week.

Acknowledgment

In the last couple of years, I have opened my Mother’s Day message with an acknowledgment. This year is not going to be any different. Mother’s Day can be a very difficult day for many.

To you ladies who want children, but for some reason cannot have them, my heart goes out to you. I know that this service can be especially hard, and it probably already has been, with the dedication of babies to the Lord. Please know that you are loved, and we don’t take you for granted or downplay or ignore your very real pain.

This day can also be difficult for those who have lost their children tragically. You are moms. You’re moms who cannot mother your child right now. I am so sorry for your loss. You also are loved and cared for by this body, and we mourn with you this day.

Finally, this day can be frustrating for those who have no desire to have children. This is a very real thing, and you may struggle just being here this morning with so much focus on children and motherhood, which is just not something you’re concerned with, at least at the moment. I get that it may not feel particularly useful for you.

And for those who have lost their moms, especially in the past year: we mourn with you as well.

I can’t understand what these women are going through, and I want to be sensitive to and respectful of that struggle, and just not mentioning it isn’t right.

My prayer for all of us today is that

Opening

This morning, my hope is that this message for Mother’s Day has application for each of us, even if we aren’t mothers (like me, for example). I pray that as we consider our passage in Proverbs today, we will all find something to learn and take away.

Just by way of warning up front: I am a complementarian, so I believe that men and women are equal in the eyes of God as it relates to grace, salvation, giftedness, and usefulness to God. However, I also see that that doesn’t (and can’t) mean that they are the same. No, men and women are different, and they are meant to be different. Men are not women, and women are not men. Each has been given roles by God in marriage and the home. These roles do not make either more important than the other, but they are distinctive. That’s not a bad thing.

This also does not mean that if you are unmarried that you are somehow a second-class citizen. Paul is clea

Proverbs 31:10–31 CSB

10 Who can find a wife of noble character? She is far more precious than jewels. 11 The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will not lack anything good. 12 She rewards him with good, not evil, all the days of her life. 13 She selects wool and flax and works with willing hands. 14 She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from far away. 15 She rises while it is still night and provides food for her household and portions for her female servants. 16 She evaluates a field and buys it; she plants a vineyard with her earnings. 17 She draws on her strength and reveals that her arms are strong. 18 She sees that her profits are good, and her lamp never goes out at night. 19 She extends her hands to the spinning staff, and her hands hold the spindle. 20 Her hands reach out to the poor, and she extends her hands to the needy. 21 She is not afraid for her household when it snows, for all in her household are doubly clothed. 22 She makes her own bed coverings; her clothing is fine linen and purple. 23 Her husband is known at the city gates, where he sits among the elders of the land. 24 She makes and sells linen garments; she delivers belts to the merchants. 25 Strength and honor are her clothing, and she can laugh at the time to come. 26 Her mouth speaks wisdom, and loving instruction is on her tongue. 27 She watches over the activities of her household and is never idle. 28 Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also praises her: 29 “Many women have done noble deeds, but you surpass them all!” 30 Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord will be praised. 31 Give her the reward of her labor, and let her works praise her at the city gates.

Pray

Let me be frank: This is a difficult passage to preach in our modern culture. For some of you, I may say some things today (in fact, I may have already) that you might think are

This also does not mean that if you are unmarried that you are somehow a second-class citizen. Paul is clear in this regard that some are called to singleness and some are single for a time in . If you marry, you haven’t sinned. If you don’t get married, you haven’t sinned. Singleness can be a blessing, and so can being married.

This passage in Proverbs is a familiar one for many of us. And to be honest, it felt a little cliched for Mother’s Day when I first considered preaching from it. However, perhaps the fact that a passage is familiar, and maybe even a little cliched in our perspective, means that we should even more soberly approach reading and studying it as the people of God. Could there be some considerations that we are missing in this passage, due to our familiarity to it?

Now, this passage is obviously a type of proverb. But what type of proverb is it? What’s its form and function? How should we interpret it? How does it fit in with the rest of Proverbs and with the rest of Scripture?

Who is author?

This passage in Proverbs is actually a poem, and a really well thought-out and creative poem at that. This poem is an acrostic, where the first letter of each verse is the next successive letter of the Hebrew alphabet. Danny Akin gave a helpful example of what this might look like in modern English in his commentary on Proverbs:

Who is the audience?

This poem is an acrostic, where the first letter of each verse is the next successive letter of the Hebrew alphabet. Danny Akin gave a helpful example of what this might look like in modern English in his commentary on Proverbs:

What is the genre of literature this

An awesome wife, who can find her?

A blessed lady, her husband trusts her.

A caring woman, she does him good all her life.

A diligent worker, she is skillful with her hands.

Since that’s the case, we are going to find some things that are common to poetry: things like figurative language (simile, metaphor) and hyperbole (mild exaggeration for effect).

I think that’s a really interesting feature that we miss in the English. So it’s a poem. Since that’s the case, we are going to find some things that are common to poetry: things like figurative language (simile, metaphor) and hyperbole (exaggeration language chosen for effect). If we are going to apply this, we aren’t going to be able to do so exactly literally.

For those women in the room who read this passage and say, “I’m never going to live up to that,” to a certain extent, you’re right. The godly woman here is idealized. She is the model that godly women should strive to become. She is the bar that godly young men should set for who they pursue and marry.

I hope that gives a moment of relief to those women in the room who read this passage and say, “I’m never going to live up to that.” That’s because, to a certain extent, you’re right.

The godly woman here is idealized. She is the model that godly women, both married and unmarried, should strive toward. She is the bar that godly young men should set for who they pursue and marry.

In the beginning of the book of Proverbs, we have two “Women” who are really personified attributes: There is the Woman Wisdom, whom we meet in , , , and 9. Then at the end of , we find the Woman Folly. The Woman Wisdom says this:

proverbs 9:10-12

Proverbs 9:10–11 CSB

10 “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding. 11 For by me your days will be many, and years will be added to your life.

The Woman Wisdom is the personification of God’s Wisdom, and she says that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of finding her. Following her leads to life and blessing.

The Woman Folly says this:

Proverbs 9:

Proverbs 9:13–18 CSB

13 Folly is a rowdy woman; she is gullible and knows nothing. 14 She sits by the doorway of her house, on a seat at the highest point of the city, 15 calling to those who pass by, who go straight ahead on their paths: 16 “Whoever is inexperienced, enter here!” To the one who lacks sense, she says, 17 “Stolen water is sweet, and bread eaten secretly is tasty!” 18 But he doesn’t know that the departed spirits are there, that her guests are in the depths of Sheol.

The Woman Folly is the opposite of Wisdom. Following her leads to death.

So here at the end of the book of Proverbs we finish the contrast between the Woman Wisdom and the Woman Folly, and we find a more concrete example of what the Woman Wisdom might look like in the flesh. The woman fears the Lord, and as such, she is an example of God’s wisdom, like the Woman Wisdom.

Proverbs 31:10 CSB

10 Who can find a wife of noble character? She is far more precious than jewels.

When the author of this poem opens with “Who can

This verse sets the stage for who we are talking about: a wife of noble character. The wife of excellent or virtuous character. Today, we will look at 3 blessings that this wife of noble character gives, and blessings that she receives.

She is a blessing to her husband.

When the author of this poem writes this “who can find?” He’s not saying that finding this woman of noble character is impossible. He’s setting up how valuable she is, especially to her husband. She is far more precious than jewels.

Then notice what it says about how he sees her:

Proverbs 31:11–12 CSB

11 The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will not lack anything good. 12 She rewards him with good, not evil, all the days of her life.

Her husband trusts her completely. Because of her trustworthiness, he is blessed. It says that he will not lack “anything good,” and that her partnership “rewards him with good… all the days of her life.” There are a couple of other verses in Proverbs that speak to the blessing of a good wife:

Proverbs 18:22 CSB

22 A man who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.

Proverbs

Proverbs 19:14 CSB

14 A house and wealth are inherited from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord.

Being married to a woman who fears the Lord is an inestimable blessing from Him. It’s a “good thing” and the man who is so married “obtains favor” from the Lord. A someone who is “prudent” is certainly someone who can be trusted in whatever he or she does. The woman of noble character is this type of person.

In another proverb, Solomon warned what a wife who lacks prudence was like, in contrast to the noble character of the woman who fears the Lord.

Proverbs 12:4 CSB

4 A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a wife who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones.

Proverbs 12:

I am so thankful for my wife! She truly is my crown. I never worry about Melanie bringing me shame. You know why? Because she is a woman of noble character. My heart trusts in her completely. Believe me, I am much more likely to bring her shame than she is to bring me shame.

There is one more place where we see the blessing that this woman of noble character is to her husband: in part due to her influence in his life, her husband is a successful member of the community.

Interestingly, verse 23 of the poem here is the centerpiece of the entire thing. Verse 23 is unique:

Proverbs 31:23 CSB

23 Her husband is known at the city gates, where he sits among the elders of the land.

This verse seems out of place. The poem is about the godly woman, and every verse is about her except verse 23, which is about her husband instead. This verse reminds us who this poem is written to: it’s written to a young man, possibly Lemuel, about the kind of woman he should marry. And the woman who fears the Lord will make a difference in who her husband becomes.

Having the wife of noble character lifts a man up, she doesn’t tear him down. Part of who he is is the fact that he married her, and that fact says something about his own wisdom and prudence. Her husband would probably not be a respected member of the elders of the community (at the city gate) without her influence.

“No man succeeds without a good woman behind him. Wife or mother, if it is both, he is twice blessed indeed.”

- Harold MacMillan, former Prime Minister of the United Kingdom

So this wife of noble character makes a positive difference in who her husband is. He can trust her.

But he is not all that she is a blessing to:

She is a blessing to her children.

There are several verses here that speak to how this godly woman is a blessing to her kids. Unfortunately, some of the things that this passage says about the ways that the godly woman is a blessing to her kids is lost on our culture and society. But that doesn’t mean that there’s no principle to apply to what we see in her relationships with her children.

Proverbs 31:13–15 CSB

Proverbs 31:13–19 CSB

13 She selects wool and flax and works with willing hands. 14 She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from far away. 15 She rises while it is still night and provides food for her household and portions for her female servants. 16 She evaluates a field and buys it; she plants a vineyard with her earnings. 17 She draws on her strength and reveals that her arms are strong. 18 She sees that her profits are good, and her lamp never goes out at night. 19 She extends her hands to the spinning staff, and her hands hold the spindle.

proverbs 31:13-

Proverbs 31:21–22 CSB

21 She is not afraid for her household when it snows, for all in her household are doubly clothed. 22 She makes her own bed coverings; her clothing is fine linen and purple.

proverbs 31:

First of all, she is a blessing because of her provision for her children. She didn’t have a Walmart or Target that she could run out to for clothing, or a supermarket for picking up groceries. It was up to this prime example of motherhood to make sure that her children were provided for. For her, that meant making clothing and other household needs, organizing the purchasing of supplies that she couldn’t produce on her own, and keeping her household running smoothly.

This of course is going to look different for different family dynamics. This passage isn’t a prescription for what a marriage or a family should look like, but a template for the type of wife a godly man should be searching for.

Danny Akin said it this way, “

I would be a crazy hot mess without my wife keeping us organized and running. She is a great example of providing for me and for our girls.

proverbs 31:

Proverbs 31:16–19 CSB

16 She evaluates a field and buys it; she plants a vineyard with her earnings. 17 She draws on her strength and reveals that her arms are strong. 18 She sees that her profits are good, and her lamp never goes out at night. 19 She extends her hands to the spinning staff, and her hands hold the spindle.

This woman is also a blessing to her children because she is industrious. When opportunity arises, she wisely capitalizes on it. She isn’t afraid of hard work when it is needed to get the job done.

Proverbs 31:26–27 CSB

26 Her mouth speaks wisdom, and loving instruction is on her tongue. 27 She watches over the activities of her household and is never idle.

Proverbs 31:25 CSB

25 Strength and honor are her clothing, and she can laugh at the time to come.

Proverbs 31:25–27 CSB

25 Strength and honor are her clothing, and she can laugh at the time to come. 26 Her mouth speaks wisdom, and loving instruction is on her tongue. 27 She watches over the activities of her household and is never idle.

proverbs 31:

Verse 25 is about her integrity and faith. This woman is a blessing to her family because she models what it means to follow the Lord.

Verse 25 is about her integrity and faith.

proverbs 31:226-27

Proverbs 31:26–27 CSB

26 Her mouth speaks wisdom, and loving instruction is on her tongue. 27 She watches over the activities of her household and is never idle.

This woman is also a blessing to her children because she teaches them with wisdom, love, and understanding. She tells them the truth, helps them to understand, and isn’t afraid to bring correction when necessary. Now that I think about it, it reads that she does these things in reference to her household.

She is a blessing to her community.

The woman who fears the Lord is a blessing to the community. She cares for others.

Proverbs 31:20 CSB

20 Her hands reach out to the poor, and she extends her hands to the needy.

Her industriousness has paid off, and she has what she needs to be able to care for those less fortunate.

Proverbs 31:24–25 CSB

24 She makes and sells linen garments; she delivers belts to the merchants. 25 Strength and honor are her clothing, and she can laugh at the time to come.

Proverbs 31:24 CSB

24 She makes and sells linen garments; she delivers belts to the merchants.

proverbs 31:24-

She’s engaged in the

She’s engaging in the commerce of the community.

This isn’t a judgment on either those who are employed in work outside of the home or not.

She receives blessings from her family, the community, and from the Lord.

Proverbs 31:28–29 CSB

28 Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also praises her: 29 “Many women have done noble deeds, but you surpass them all!”

proverbs 31:

Where to the children learn to praise her? From her husband.

Proverbs 31:30–31 CSB

30 Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord will be praised. 31 Give her the reward of her labor, and let her works praise her at the city gates.

Last two verses are the Lord speaking

The Lord is the speaker here, or the Woman Wisdom. Her family praises her, the Lord praises her, and her works bring her praise from the community.

Application

So I mentioned at the beginning that my prayer was that we would all be able to take something away from this passage today. So let’s make some application.

For married ladies: while this model woman may seem unattainable, a lot of that just goes back to the fact that we’re looking at poetry language: absolute language words like anything and never. However, just because that’s the case, that doesn’t mean that you just throw up your hands in frustration and give up. No, you pursue living out this model. And older ladies, you model it for the youngers.

Unmarried ladies: this is who you should be striving to be in your life, as much as possible in your current position (no kids, no husband). This woman of virtue and strength is a wonderful example to follow, if even you never marry or have children.

For husbands: praise your wives, like the husband in the proverb does. I’ve heard it said (and no telling how true it is) that in the heart of a woman, it takes 80 positive statements to overcome one hurtful thing. Whether that’s true or not doesn’t really matter as if we’re going to keep count. The concept is there: speak life to your wife. Praise her in front of your children. Praise her in front of other people.

For unmarried men: This is who you should be seeking in a wife. It doesn’t say that you shouldn’t marry a beautiful woman, but it does say that those things will fade away, and since they are not permanent, you should look first for a woman of godly character.

But our ultimate application comes from a different perspective:

We are all to be this kind of bride.

Bride of Christ: We as the church are the bride of our bridegroom, Jesus.

Closing

Ephesians 5:32 CSB

32 This mystery is profound, but I am talking about Christ and the church.

Look at how Paul spoke to the church at Corinth about the church’s role as the Bride:

2 Corinthians 11:2 CSB

2 For I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy, because I have promised you in marriage to one husband—to present a pure virgin to Christ.

And consider the message of the Gospel in the picture of the Bridegroom and the Bride:

Ephesians 5:22–33 CSB

22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord, 23 because the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of the body. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives are to submit to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word. 27 He did this to present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or anything like that, but holy and blameless. 28 In the same way, husbands are to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hates his own flesh but provides and cares for it, just as Christ does for the church, 30 since we are members of his body. 31 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. 32 This mystery is profound, but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 To sum up, each one of you is to love his wife as himself, and the wife is to respect her husband.

ephesians 5:22-

It’s so easy to just take this as a “marriage” passage, but Paul means for us to see two pictures here. Verse 32 is explicit. He’s talking also about Christ and the Church. And we are to walk in submission to Christ, because He has taken the initiative of loving us, giving Himself up for us, making us holy, washing us clean from our sin so that He can present us to Himself in splendor! Yes, this passage is about marriage, but the example of who a husband should be is Jesus. And I would suggest that the example of who the church should be is the wife of noble character.

Jesus has done all that is

For all of us, as the bride of Christ: do we see the church in this picture? Do we live this out? Our bridegroom sacrificed Himself to make us holy (). Do we honor that sacrifice?

Closing

It is through faith that we are saved and become a part of the bride of Christ, the church, accepting the offer of this marriage from the ultimate Bridegroom.

For husbands: praise your wives, like the husband in the proverb does.

Is Jesus calling you to surrender today, submitting to Him in faith, so that He can take you and make you holy? He died for each of us, so that we could be saved. Surrender to the lover of your soul. We would love to talk with you about that pray with you.

Membership in the church.

For all of us, as the bride of Christ: do we see the church in this picture? Do we live this out? Our bridegroom sacrificed Himself to make us holy (). Do we honor that sacrifice?

Some other decision.

Pray.

Invite to parlor.

Turn over to Wayne.

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